Keys to Power: The Asking Practice

All study at The Academy begins with The Asking Practice.

Power is not a feeling or a mood.  Power is the ability to have powerful relationships where influence is shared and moves in both directions.

As a woman's power grows, the freedom she finds in this exercise and in the relationships in her life does, as well.

Expanding the range of what she can ask for is the first key to power I want every woman to master.

INSTRUCTIONS: The Asking Practice

On a sheet of paper you write:

I could ask ______ for ________.

Fill it in with a man’s name and something you want.

Repeat.

Fill the page or write until you run out of steam.

This is an exercise of your imagination only.  You will not have to ask these men for these things so you can write whatever you like.  Explore the edges of your imagination!

We are exploring the boundary between where your permission ends, and others’ permission begins

Here's a few things that may come up.

1.  I DON’T HAVE ANY MEN!

Men make up roughly half of everyone you've ever met.  Because this is an exercise in imagination, see if there are any men who didn’t make it onto your Asking Practice.  

Ex-boyfriends?  Family members? Bosses?  Employees?  Everyone is fair game! 

Bonus Exercise:   
Do an Asking Practice on men you didn't initially consider. Expand the limits of your imagination.

2.  I DON’T HAVE ANYTHING TO ASK FOR!

Every woman has an internal logic for the things she would ask for, and the things she would never ask for.

WHAT IS IT FOR YOU?

Here are some common ones:

I can’t ask if . . . .

If I can pay for it myself anyway
If I can’t pay for it myself.
If I am able to do it myself.
If I am able to do it but don’t enjoy it.
If I haven’t earned it.
If it means I’ll owe someone later. 

I can only ask if . . .

If I am absolutely desperate.
If I don’t need it all.
If it’s practical and logical.
If I've deserved it.
Id

See if you can use your imagination to explore some edges. 

3.  I CAN’T EVEN WRITE THAT DOWN BECAUSE OF WHAT IT WOULD MEAN IF I ASKED!

For millennia, women have been conditioned through a series of spoken and unspoken rules to walk an impossible line between being "too much" and "too little," constantly checking their own behavior for the benefit of others, even when others would benefit from her breaking those rules.  This is how the silencing of women begins.

At The Academy, we call this compression and we work with each of our students to break free from compression and express the full range of their being.

Whether you take a class at The Academy or not, expanding the range of what you can ask for is the first key to power I want every woman to master.

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